Doin' Me

Last Saturday I got my hair done. Not one of my numerous sew-ins or quick weaves. I actually got MY hair done today. Washed, conditioned, twisted, and styled. I must ssay that I am very proud of myself. One might ask why....well, it took a lot of courage for me to make the concious decision to let loose a part of me that I have chosen to keep concealed, as if it were a curse. Many of my culture chooses to call our hair just that...a curse. I think our hair, just like our many shades and diversity, make us the most unique humans on the face of the earth. Saturday, I left my stylist home with a sense of achievement. Not with my head down, but looking straight ahead and walking in such a way only a queen can! I went through the rest of my day wanting to skip around because I felt so free. Felt as if I let go of some very heavy baggage. I have worn my hair 'natural' for most of my life...but you wouldn't know it because it was always hidden by all the weaves I typically wear. So I felt like I had won a trillion bucks, because I sort of had a 'coming out' party and didn't care who said what about it! Then the shock set in when I got up on Sunday morning to prepare for church. Looking at myself in the mirror and loving how my hair looked. Questions went through my mind as to how people would receive me. Again, crippled by what I thought the 'world' might think actually made me consider not going to church that day. Needless to say, I went on to church and had a blast, until.... When I greeted people and was complimented on my hair, it was met with some 'tightness'...I felt as if I was receiving pity compliments..then I did the worst of all...I began to say that I didn't like my hair...and at the time I didn't because I was feeling so insecure about it. It's a sad shame how we have been conditioned to hate ourselves. Many will say that they don't hate themselves....really? So, right now I'll just speak for myself...YES, my insecurities has equaled self-hatred. What I have naturally, people in other countries are paying up to $3000 for a super tight perm, just so they can have an afro. HELLO!

Now, will I ever wear a weave again? The answer is leading toward a strong yes, however, I have chosen to never look at myself in disgust because "I can't do anything with my hair". I can do so much with it. I will embrace it and love what God has designed in me.

Make the choice today to do you! We are created and born individuals, yet so many die as clones. Be all that God made you to be and not looking to what others consider beauty. Choose to live freely! Amen

Psalm 139:14(NIV) ~ I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; I know that full well.